The Most Common Issues Women Bring Up In Therapy

While women are not ironclad, many experience societal pressures and cultural expectations (such as being told what not to wear by a controlling partner, or the pressures that come with childbearing).These issues are usually brought up in a safe place like a therapist’s office.

Of course, these issues vary by age, race, religion, and socioeconomic status.Emma Mahony, a therapist at A Better Life Therapy in Philadelphia and a creator of mental health content on TikTok, said, “But I think there’s a lot of things that I’ve seen a lot, and a lot of similar themes that come up a lot in relationships.”

These questions can be overwhelming at times, but it helps to know that you’re not the only one experiencing them.Below, experts share some of the questions women often ask in therapy and some advice on how to respond.

Life’s twists and turns

According to Meredith Van Ness, psychotherapist and owner of the Meredith Van Ness Treatment Center in Colorado, life transitions are the reason many people seek treatment.

Becoming a parent, divorce, empty nest syndrome, or menopause.These transitions bring with them a range of emotions and challenges, and therapy can provide support and guidance during these times.

Any major life adjustment can bring up unresolved issues from the past, whether it’s the loneliness that comes with moving to a new place due to the loss of a loved one as a child, or the frustration that arises when your child moves out, reminiscent of the depression you experienced in college.

Increasing self-awareness is one of the ways she helps her clients navigate through life’s transitions.This helps people understand why they are going through such a difficult time and what they can do to make themselves feel better.

Inability to define yourself outside of motherhood, marriage or career

Many women struggle with their identity – “Who am I other than a mom, a wife or a girlfriend?”The same is true of their identities outside of their professions.

This can manifest as, “I’ve just recently become a mom and I don’t feel like I have any friends” or “I don’t feel like I’m connecting with my friends like I used to”. ……This can also happen to people who are transitioning to a new career or don’t really know what they want to do, but know that what they are doing now isn’t right for them.

People go to therapy to work through the problem while still maintaining the relationships they want with their children, their partner, or to fulfill their daily job responsibilities.

Once you’ve identified your goals and aspirations, you can prioritize the ones that make you feel accomplished and take steps to achieve them.

Pressure on motherhood, e.g. not wanting a child or wanting a child but having difficulty getting pregnant

I think the whole spectrum of reproduction and fertility is also relevant to a large number of therapeutic issues for women.

Whether it’s talking about not wanting a baby, the stress of pregnancy, infertility, stress over uncertainty about reproductive rights in the U.S., or how to balance a child and a career, many baby-related issues are at the center of treatment.

There are certain beliefs and societal expectations that need to be addressed.Many ideas about pregnancy and motherhood are deeply ingrained in our culture.You can decide to adopt a child at age 45, get pregnant years after a friend does, or decide not to have children at all, and that’s okay.

While these are difficult topics to deal with,it’s important to have normalized conversations with the women around you – and not make others feel judged.

It is very important to interact with other women so that they understand that women are not monolithic.Today in America, women are represented in countless ways.We’re hard enough on ourselves as it is, and the last thing we should be doing is questioning the choices women make, but rather being more curious and open to their experiences.

Self-esteem and self-worth

Common concerns include self-esteem and self-worth ……How people feel about themselves.

Van Ness has been helping many of her clients build their confidence “so that they can show up in life and be who they want to be without having to worry too much about social pressures and body image, or even about past traumas or past relationships that may diminish their sense of self-worth and sense of self.”

Lack of self-esteem also manifests itself in self-comparisons and negative self-talk.

It’s never too late to start improving your relationship with yourself.Getting to know yourself better and understanding your limiting beliefs can ultimately help you break this harmful cycle.She points to journaling, support groups, and therapy as ways to get to know yourself more deeply.

The pressure of having to get everything done

There is a deep-rooted belief that women need to do everything alone – work, clean, cook, raise children – without any help.Many women struggle with the idea that they should be superhuman.They should get everything done.Not only that, they should get it all done with a smile on their face.

Brown said her clients feel that society demands a lot of them and it’s hard to know where to start, especially when certain pressures aren’t something they’re willing to take on.

She works with clients to analyze these expectations, including where they come from and when they arise.Generally, when people “do it all,” they usually do it to please others, and that’s a problem.

If you’re always working hard and doing all these things to please others, how can you please yourself?Right?How do you develop that relationship with yourself?You don’t feel like you have to prove yourself to anyone.

Apprehensive

Women may experience high levels of stress and anxiety due to a variety of factors such as work pressures, family responsibilities, social expectations and personal goals.

Anxiety is also associated with overthinking, and overthinking can manifest itself in self-doubt – such as overanalyzing your behavior in past situations.For example, think back to a time when you overanalyzed something you said at a party.You may have thought, “Why did I say that?”Or “Why am I so stupid?”And in reality, no one may be thinking about the so-called mistake you’re obsessing over.

To solve this problem, focus on looking at the rational thought patterns in your life, not the irrational ones.Does it bother anyone as much as the “stupid things” you say at parties?Probably not.In addition, you can consider what thoughts are keeping you stuck in past behaviors and what thought processes you can change to move forward.

It’s important to get help to cope with all this

If you feel the same way, then know that you are not alone and you don’t have to face this alone.A busy culture demands a lot from people, so it’s no surprise that you’re feeling overwhelmed.

There are fewer and fewer safe spaces for women, which makes many feel that they just need to get it “right” the first time.Think about it: If a woman is older and hasn’t settled down, she gets blamed for it.But if she’s a single mom, she gets blamed for that, too.It’s very unfair.

A lot of double standards also lead women to develop this superhero and superwoman complex.

It’s important for women to find a group of people they can rely on during difficult times.We’re not supposed to handle things alone.We are social animals.It’s very important for women to rely on other women.

You can seek support from friends or family, as well as help through therapy, which can help you with any of these issues (and more).